Save Game’s Celebration of the Saints: A series of Saints Row themed cocktails

saintsrowbanner1Saints Row IV is almost upon us. We’ve strapped ourselves in and we’re ready to experience what is one of our most anticipated games of 2013. But before we dive deeply into the awesomeness that is Saints Row IV, we thought we’d look back on all the Saints that have come before, and celebrate their contribution to the series. We present to you our Celebration of the Saints: A series of Saints Row themed cocktails.

Saints Row Saints

Shot to the Head – Julius Little

JuliusThe original leader of the Saints, Julius was the protagonist’s first look at gang life, and what it takes to command a group of angry, disenfranchised, frustrated individuals. Having recruited Johnny Gat, Dexter Jackson, Troy Bradshaw, Lin and Aisha, Julius takes the fight to the gangs with the aim of ridding Stillwater of all the other major players on the streets. After successfully destroying all other gangs, Julius has a change of heart and drops his flags, arguing that the Saints had become exactly what he was trying to stop. Whilst Julius does betray the protagonist towards the end of Saints Row 2, he remains who he was throughout the original game – dedicated, driven and motivated to see Stillwater free from drugs and violence. The Shot to the Head reflects this – a smooth drink that deceives with its sweetness but hides a strong hit – and references the unfortunate end visited upon Julius.

Recipe

  • Rim the glass with chocolate syrup then add
  • 1 oz Baileys
  • 1/3 oz Galliano Ristretto
  • 1/3 oz Galliano Vanilla Liqueur
  • 1/3 oz Frangelico Hazlenut Liqueur
  • 2 teaspoons of cream
  • 2 teaspoons of sweetened condensed milk
  • Fill with milk

The Trojan Horse – Troy Bradshaw

TroyTroy was Julius’s second in command, and was with him when he rescued the protagonist in the original Saints Row from a gang turf war. The sarcastic joker of the Saints, Troy was always quick with snide remarks and smarmy asides. Often asking a lot of questions about his fellow Saints plans, Troy was revealed to be an undercover cop at the end of Saints Row, and becomes the Chief of Police in Saints Row 2. Always with a cigarette in his hand, and a frequent patron of Tee’N'Ay, this drink is multifaceted like Troy, and just as cutting. If you drink one of these, be prepared for one hell of a kick to the guts – which is, we’re sure, exactly what the protagonist felt when Troy revealed himself to be a rat.

Recipe

  • 1 oz Jagermeister
  • 1/2 oz White Sambuca
  • 1/2 oz Creme de Menthe
  • 1/3 oz Mandarin Liqueur
  • Fill with Red Bull

The Eight Inch – Johnny Gat

GatFull of surprises, Johnny started off as a brash, hot-headed man chasing violence for the thrill of it. Favouring a front door approach to strategising, Johnny’s plans often involved as much violence and bloodshed as possible. To call him trigger happy would be an understatement, as his body count is likely only second to the protagonist themselves. Having spent time in prison and watched as his on-again, off-again girlfriend Aisha got beheaded by a Katana, Johnny has seen a lot during his time as a Saint. And yet, his devotion to the Saints, and loyalty to their leader the protagonist, has never wavered. He is as iconic as the Fleur-de-Lis used as the Saints logo, instantly as recognisable, and his drink reflects this. Scotch and Triple Sec deliver a one-two punch, and honey and ginger beer let the drink slide easily down. Trust us when we say, the combination of these ingredients will make you want to take the full eight inches.

Recipe

  • Rim the glass with honey and then add:
  • 2 oz Scotch
  • 1/2 oz Vanilla Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Triple Sec
  • Fill with ginger beer

The Tactician – Dex Jackson

DexOne of the original members appointed by Julius to the Third Street Saints, Dex was the brains of the operation. He was the man with the plan, the tactician of the group, and he could always be relied upon to provide the voice of reason. As a result, he was the yin to Johnny Gat’s yang, attempting to moderate Gat’s almost insatiable bloodlust. Despite showing his cogitating capabilities, Dex appeared to be never truly respected amongst the gang, which perhaps contributed to his decision to drop his flags and join the Ultor Corporation. After betraying the Saints and engaging in some very amoral behaviour, Dex flees the city. His drink reflects his character – refined but with a tart aftertaste. But unlike Dex – after you have one of these, you won’t want to quit.

Recipe

  • 1 oz Whiskey
  • 1/2 oz Triple Sec
  • 1/2 oz Vanilla Liqueur
  • Fill with half orange and half cranberry juice

The Ride to Heaven – Lin

LinAs the only female lieutenant amongst the original Third Street Saints, Lin had a lot to prove. And prove it she did, tackling every mission given to her with finesse and panache, and just a little bit of punching. Often seen disagreeing with Johnny, Lin nevertheless respected the Saints and was dedicated to what they stood for.  She used her skills and her abilities as the ‘best racer to ever come out of Chinatown’ to take down the Westside Rollerz, but some keen deduction on behalf of the real power behind the Rollerz led to her being unmasked as a mole. Shot and left for dead in the trunk of her beloved car, she succumbed to her wound and died. But her memory lives on in this drink – powerful, with a touch of femininity, the name reflecting her unfortunate demise.

Recipe

  • 1 oz Bourbon
  • 1/2 oz Apple Schnapps
  • 1/2 oz Coconut Rum
  • Dash of Angostura Bitters
  • Fill with ginger beer

Saints Row 2 Saints

Wasted – Shaundi

Shaundi-2If we could point to our favourite character across all the Saints, Shaundi would be right up there. A confident woman who did what she wanted and took no shit from anyone, Shaundi’s penchants for drugs and sex were often referenced by members of the Saints. Dreadlocked, with numerous tattoos, Shaundi had a laid back attitude and tackled missions in her own unique way. She’s spent time as a student and served time in prison, and whilst she often can’t be relied upon to have your back in a fight (we’ll blame the Loa Dust) we still wouldn’t want her any other way. Her drink is a celebration of what we believe would happen when she gets completely wasted in game: mixing horrible sounding ingredients in the belief they will somehow combine to make something that tastes amazing. Spoiler: They really, really don’t. Just like Shaundi – don’t try this unless you’ve got a steel stomach and a fortitude to match.

Recipe

  • 1 oz Jagermeister
  • 1/2 oz Bourbon
  • 1/2 oz Amaretto
  • 1/3 oz Chambord
  • Add whipped cream and strawberry pop rocks on top
  • Garnish with an umbrella because fuck it, it looks pretty

Red Asphalt – Carlos Mendoza

CarlosAn inmate at the Stillwater Penitentiary, and occupying the bed next to the protagonist when they awaken during the opening of Saints Row 2, Carlos was a young man out to prove himself in the big bad world of gangs. His dedication to doing what needed to be done cannot be questioned – after all, he got himself stabbed simply to meet up with the protagonist and help them break out of prison. Whilst he was a little wet behind the ears and didn’t have the information gathering skills of the other lieutenants in Saints Row 2, Carlos was committed to doing the best he could. His devoutness to the Saints is often shown through his loyalty to the Protagonist. Unfortunately for Carlos, he was kidnapped by the gang he was sent to infiltrate, chained to a trailer hitch, and brutally dragged behind it. Suffering horrible wounds, his pain is only ended by the protagonist performing a mercy killing. His drink reflects the duel sides to his personality – strength and softness – and takes its name from the events that led to his untimely end.

Recipe

  • 1 oz Kahlua
  • 1/2 oz Cherry Brandy
  • 1/2 oz Coconut Rum
  • Fill with coke

Oh – and we thought about making a cocktail for Pierce, but let’s be honest – who gives a fuck about Pierce?!

Saints Row 3 Saints

The Wired Teacup – Kinzie Kensington

KinzieFormer F.B.I, Kinzie is an electronics goddess and what she doesn’t know about computers isn’t worth knowing. Saved from the Deckers by the Saints, some may call Kinzie a paranoid agoraphobic, but to us she’s simply Tea Cup. She’s a computer hacker extraordinare, barely sleeps, doesn’t wash her hair and yet she’s one of the most competent of the Saints lieutenants. A fan of hardcore gangsta rap, she has an assortment of very….interesting items in her inner sanctum (you always have to watch the quiet ones) and appears happiest when she’s regaling the protagonist about her computer related exploits. Her drink symbolizes her love of staying up to work on her latest laptop project – with Alize Red Passion, Strawberry liqueur, Red Bull and a twizzler to finish, this is one drink that will have you so buzzed, you won’t even notice the sun coming up. And really – who needs sleep?

Recipe

  • 1 oz Alize Red Passion
  • 1/2 oz Strawberry Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Chambord
  • Fill with half Red Bull half Pink Lemonade
  • Add a red twizzler to finish

The Russian Superman – Oleg Kirrlov

OlegHe’s big. He’s strong. He packs a punch. Standing over 7 feet tall and more muscly than a man has a right to be, Oleg was imprisoned by the Syndicate and used as the blueprint to create brutes. The Syndicate got the strength right, but sadly the clones produced lacked Oleg’s impressive intellect. Saved by the Saints, Oleg assists with taking down the Syndicate and becomes a lieutenant in order to rid Steelport of the remaining gang influence. Often advocating for the logical course of action, Oleg is definitely a thinker who enjoys intellectual pursuits. His drink speaks to his size – it’s strong and hits you hard. But we also think Oleg has a soft spot, and if we were betting gals we’d wager he loves cream and sprinkles. And there ain’t no shame at all in enjoying some sprinkle action.

Recipe

  • 1 oz Galliano Ristretto
  • 1 oz Kahlua
  • 1 oz Vodka
  • 1/2 oz Frangelico Hazelnut Liqueur
  • Fill with milk
  • Add whipped cream and sprinkles to finish
  • Garnish with an umbrella

The B Grade – Shaundi

Shaundi-3The Shaundi we see in Saints Row 3 is in stark contrast to the Shaundi we saw in Saints Row 2. Gone are the dreadlocks, the relaxed attitude and slacker lifestyle. The tattoos have been removed (at least the back tattoo has, though the star on her hand remains) and in their place is a sleeker, more professional look. Shaundi’s swapped the Loa Dust and Skee Ball for slicked back hair and svelte clothes, preferring a more focused attitude given her new celebrity status. Starring in her own reality show, Shaundi retains her confrontational, confident attitude, and at the loss of Johnny Gat, becomes completely focused on taking down the Syndicate. Often at odds with the other female lieutenants, Shaundi is not afraid to speak her mind or stand up for herself, and she shows that once she fixes her mind on something, it will become hers. Her drink reflects her change in personality – sleek, refined and professional, yet still maintaining her relatively….bohemian edge.

Recipe

  • add blueberries to the base of the glass
  • 1/3 oz Cherry Brandy
  • 1 oz White Peach and Passionfruit Juice
  • Fill with Champagne

The DeWynter Double – Kiki and Viola DeWynter

DewynterKiki may not be a Saint, but she’s so intimately connected to her sister Viola that we had to include her as part of Viola’s drink. Originally the lieutenants of the Morningstar gang, Kiki and Viola were the brains of the operation, increasing the profits of the Syndicate more than ten times whilst they were in charge of finances. Viola joins the Saints after her sister Kiki is killed in a fit of anger by Killbane. Providing her talents to the Saints, Viola is smart, savvy and knows her way around an assault rifle. She has a somewhat prickly relationship with most of the Saints lieutenants, the majority of whom simply don’t trust her, given her prior ties with the other gangs. Yet Viola shows through many missions her loyalty to the Saints and re-affirms her willingness to do whatever is needed to take down the rival gangs. Her drink reflects her close ties with her sister – one shot is smooth whilst the other is fruity – they go well by themselves but together they’re better.

Recipe

For Kiki -

  • 1/3 oz White Creme de Cao
  • 1/3 oz Butterscotch Schnapps
  • 1/3 oz Frangelico Hazlenut Liqueur

For Viola -

  • 1/3 oz Chambord
  • 1/3 oz Peach Schnapps
  • 1/3 oz Parfait Amour

The Ego Trip – Josh Birk

JoshWhere, oh where do we start with Josh Birk? An actor who shadows the Saints as part of his research for his upcoming role, Josh is best described as big talk, small action. He’s an imbecile and a narcicist, and it’s due to his bumbling that the Saints are arrested and jailed at the beginning of Saints Row 3. Best known for his portrayal of Nyte Blayde – the vampire hunter turned vampire who’s simply misunderstood – Josh has a massive crush on Shaundi. Despite the fact that Shaundi does not share his feelings, Josh requests to stay with the Saints simply to be near her – a request the protagonist can agree to or disallow. When interacting with other homies, Josh appears to irritate more than ingratiate, but all things considered, he’s mostly harmless. Unless you’re Shaundi, and then you want to kill him. His drink is a reflection of his character – a mellow drink for the sensitive, new age man, with just enough alcohol to stop others from calling you a lightweight. If Josh could try it, we know he’d love it.

Recipe

  • 3/4 oz Bacardi Rum
  • 3/4 oz Mango Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Banana Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Melon Liqueur
  • Fill with Orange Juice
  • Garnish with an umbrella

The Love Pony – Zimos

ZimosWe have to be honest, Zimos is our favourite Saint. I mean, how could you not love a guy who speaks using an electronic voice box, with auto-tune enabled?! He’s the pimp with the swagger, the lover who’s done it all (including Shaundi and one of the DeWynter’s, he can’t quite remember which one), and he’s not afraid to let it all hang out as evidenced in our first introduction to him. Steelport’s oldest pimp, his connections to the criminal underworld are priceless to the protagonist, allowing them to quickly hit the other gangs where it hurts them the most.  Whilst Zimos is most defnitely a lover first and a fighter…well, almost last, he’s still very good to have at your back, if only for his extremely amusing quips. His drink is him to a T, mixing the alcohol whose name means ‘perfect love’ with Champagne and Goldwasser. It’s the most fun you can have without being ridden like a human pony for 80 bucks an hour.

Recipe

  • place an hibiscus flower in the bottom of the glass
  • 1/3 oz Parfait Amour
  • 1/3 oz Mandarin Liqueur
  • 1/3 oz Baitz Goldwasser
  • Fill with champagne

S.T.A.G – The Special Tactical Anti Gang Unit

STAGThey’re not Saints, but we couldn’t not include what we believe were the most memorable baddies across the three games. S.T.A.G, headed by the bold and fearless Cyrus Temple, exploded on the scene after the Luchadores launched an aggressive attack on the city of Steelport. A take no prisoners, elite paramilitary group, S.T.A.G utilised high tech weaponry to become a thorn in the side of the Saints. Seemingly pursuing the Saints with a focused determination, S.T.A.G could be relied upon to break up any illegal party the Saints planned with alarming regularity. Their weapons and body armor were impressive, their numbers doubly so, and their two massive aircraft – the Thermopylae and the Daedalus – practically dwarfed anything ever seen in any previous Saints Row game. Their drink celebrates the colours of their leader, Cyrus Temple, and provides a bold and fruity flavour. The alcohol may be bad for you, but the fruit is totally good, right?

Recipe

  • 1 oz Bacardi Rum
  • 1/2 oz Melon Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Blue Curacao
  • Fill with half Pinapple Juice and half Orange Juice
  • add mango chunks to garnish

Righteous Fury – Nyte Blayde

Nyte-BlaydeA Vampire hunter turned Vampire, Nyte Blayde is the fictional character played by Josh Birk in the aptly titled ‘Nyte Blayde’ TV show. He’s a man with a purpose, after the death of his wife spurs him on a path of revenge, bringing righteous fury to the damned using his twin blades. After being turned into a vampire, the order he was once fighting with turns against him and he becomes the hunted. A brooding, serious, conflicted soul, Josh Birk has described Nyte Blayde as simply being misunderstood. But one thing’s for certain – if you choose him as one of your homies, Nyte Blayde will show a ferocity and a devotion to killing every enemy in his way that rivals the most ferocious of Nyte Creatures. His drink is red, like the blood of his enemies, tempered with a sweet taste to mirror his sensitive, misunderstood side. Don’t forget to add the honey-covered raspberry – looking every bit like a recently staked heart.

Recipe

  • 1/3 oz Raspberry Liqueur
  • 1/3 oz Melon Liqueur
  • 1/3 oz Strawberry Liqueur
  • Garnish with a honey covered raspberry

Unmasked – Angel De La Muerte

AngelA former Luchadore, Angel joins the Saints after being humiliated by Killbane, who was once his tag-team partner in the ring. After his public shaming, Angel becomes a hermit, rarely seen in public, instead seeking solace within his gym where he keeps his body honed with hours of training. He joins the Saints seeking revenge on Killbane, and is a valuable addition to the gang. His methods of training the protagonist to be ready to face Killbane may seem…kooky (after all, he makes you ride around with a Tiger for a passenger, and dive in front of cars to harden you up) but Angel is a man with a single purpose and a steely resolve. His drink reflects his personality and his origins: green for the colour of the Luchadores, slightly whimsical, but with a dose of alcohol that hits you right where it hurts.

Recipe

  • 1/2 oz Coconut Rum
  • 1/2 oz Blue Curacao
  • 1/2 oz Vodka
  • 1/2 oz Silver Tequila
  • Fill with Passionfruit Soda

The Burt Fucking Reynolds – Burt Reynolds

Mayor-ReynoldsThere’s really not much we can say about this one. It’s inspired by Burt Reynolds, the mayor of Steelport and all around badass. He’s the guy every woman wants to bang, and every guy wants to be friends with. He’s the only guy who can wear a cowboy hat and absolutely nail it without looking like a douche. When a zombie outbreak threatens his city, he calls the protagonist for help (let’s not mention it was the protagonist who caused the outbreak in the first place) and depending on your choices, he becomes a recruitable homie later in the game. He’s had a thing with Kinzie, is watched warily by Oleg, and even the protagonist is a fan. No stranger to fighting, Burt doesn’t bother with weapons, instead favouring his fists of steel to settle any arguments. His drink is like him: simple, sexy and moorish. Trust us when we say that you won’t stop at one. Just as Burt would want.

Recipe

  • 1/3 oz Bourbon
  • 1/3 oz White Creme de Cao
  • 1/3 oz Cherry Brandy
  • 3 dashes of Angostura Bitters

Show Your Colours – The Saints Row Gangs

GangsOur Celebration of the Saints wouldn’t be complete if we didn’t pay homage to the rival gangs from the games. These are the enemies the Saints have been fighting for years, from the humble beginnings of the street gangs seen in Saints Row to the more refined, more tactical gangs encountered in Saints Row 3. From the Los Carnales to the Brotherhood and the Syndicate, the Westside Rollerz to the Deckers, the Ronin and the Sons of Samedi. Their colours have ranged from Red to Blue to Green and Yellow but they’ve each maintained a singleminded devotion to destroying the Saints. They’ve been arrogant and aggressive, callous and cruel, but each has been memorable in their own way. Our shots are designed to be taken either one by one, or all at once for those of you who like a challenge. Beware though – after all four of these shots, you’ll be down for the count.

Recipe

Blue -

  • 1/2 oz Hypnotiq
  • 1/2 oz Blue Curacao

Red -

  • 1/2 oz Raspberry Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Strawberry Liqueur

Yellow -

  • 1/2 oz Banana Liqueur
  • 1/2 oz Mango Liqueur

Green -

  • 1/2 oz Creme de Menthe
  • 1/2 oz Melon Liqueur

And that concludes our….no, wait. We have one more cocktail. To celebrate what was, to us at least, a very important, very turbulent time in the history of Saints Row classifications…

█████ – The Australian Edition

Australian-Edition

It’s been a case of will it be classified, won’t it be classified in relation to the Australian version of Saints Row 4. Originally refused classification, this decision was upheld upon appeal and it seemed as though Aussies wouldn’t be seeing Saints Row 4 in any form on their shores. Just when all seemed lost, however, an edited version of the game was classified as MA15+ and all Aussie gamers rejoiced. We wouldn’t be denied the joy of playing Saints Row 4, and all we had to sacrifice was a Shaundi mission and all mention of using alien narcotics to obtain superpowers. The Australian Edition cocktail celebrates all things ████ and we believe it just might be our most shocking cocktail yet.

Recipe

  • 1 oz █████
  • 1/2 oz ███████
  • 1/2 oz █████████
  • Add ████ to garnish
  • Fill with water

And there you have it – our Celebration of the Saints cocktail feature. It’s taken us a lot of planning, a lot of preparation, a lot of buying alcohol (yes, I received some very interesting looks when I bought a trolley full of spirits) and a lot of trying different flavours to get the combinations just right.

But now it’s up to you – try out our cocktails – send us through images of you making and enjoying them. We would love to see them.

And if you have any comments for us – please leave them in the comments section below.


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    About the Author: (@MidnightReyn) Founder and Editor-in-Chief

    Tash

    Tash is a self-diagnosed gaming fanatic with a doctorate in Psychology. She's also a self-confessed Mass Effect fangirl and will likely talk your ears off if you ever get her started on the subject. A lover of all things RPG and adventure, she has more gamer related action figures and memorabilia than any 20 something year old professional has a right to own, and has spent more time than she’d like to admit to daydreaming about exactly what she would do should the Zombie Apocalypse actually happen.

    • Micha Montgomery

      Just thought the Professor needed a drink. This is one of mine that I Make and enjoy although I never gave it a name before. Try it you will like it.